Finding Balance

Hey Readers,

So after two years of trying my hand at this balancing act of “Actor,” I think I am finally getting the hang of finding balance in one of the most unpredictable career paths out there. The balance and peace has to come from within, and I had to first find balance in myself as a person, not as an actor. It is so easy, and natural to feel anxiety and stress over unemployment and bad auditions. For most of my time since graduating from WCC, I decided that unemployment = death. No joke. I was terrified of it, and often felt hopeless when a job ended. I would decide in my head that I wasn’t doing something right, that I wasn’t good enough, I was too tall, fat, thin, shy, outgoing, etc. I put even more weight and pressure on my shoulders for the next job — causing more stress and anxiety then before.

Frankly, we live in a society where time is money, and as a culture we see unemployment as the result of laziness, lack of talent, uselessness, or bad luck. Over the last few weeks, I had a huge wake-up call. Thanks to the help of Ryan and Christopher, I realized that I have had unrealistic expectations of myself — and of the industry. While its great to dream big, being realistic in this indusrty is a must. The reality of the situation is that unemployment is part of the job of an actor — and that’s OKAY! I am still very much adjusting to this concept.

I suppose the real test will come around in two weeks, when Princess and the Pea ends and I am left with a wide open calendar. I am really going to try to look at that reality as part of life, and maybe something positive! Just think, I have no idea what my future holds! One side of the coin says that that is scary, empty, and bad — the other side says that the possibilities are endless and I should be excited. I am choosing to look at the positive side of the coin — difficult as it may end up being.

Either way, I am going to look at myself and the industry through different eyes then I have for the past two years. Most importantly, I am going to remember that acting, singing, dancing, and modeling isn’t everything. Life is so much more then that, and I should be thankful for those other things too. I have so many amazing things in my life that are positive and wonderful everyday, and that is where I can truly find my balance — as a person AND an actor.

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~ by Elizabeth on July 12, 2008.

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